I’m going on a ‘boy’s weekend’ this, erm, weekend. The words would normally fill me with dread but it’s our band and we’re more brothers than ‘boys’ in the stag sense. Dysfunctional brothers but siblings all the same. We all love music and that is our main focus for this weekend. That and a lot of drinking.
In any other situation though I would probably do all I can do to avoid ‘hanging out with the boys.’ I’m not really a boy’s boy. I go to the pub and watch football, etc but I’ll be honest, if I see a group of ‘lads’ being all ‘laddy’ walking down the street, I’ll more than likely cross to the other side. Nothing against lads, boys, men, the male species, etc I just prefer the company of women. Not in a Hugh Hefner kind of way. Let me explain.
If we want to go right back I probably define my relationship with man and woman by my relationship with my mother and father (here comes my therapysessions). My parents split up when I was fifteen and I stayed with my Mum. Dad moved two hundred miles away and so naturally I formed a closer bond to Mother Lloyd. Up until that point, I’d been very shy around girls and stuck with my gang of boys.
After my Dad left, I become much more trusting of girls than I did of boys and my relationships started to change. I had my first girlfriend soon after that and when I left school, without any sense of career direction, I decided to train as a hairdresser. I was the only male on the course. Very similar to Welsh David, in the village. I was a rubbish hairdresser but I learnt so much about women. How they behave, how they think how they interact with each other, how they interact with me. And I loved it. I loved being around them. And I love it to this day.
I would say out of all my close friends today, 70% of them would be female. It’s not that I don’t like hanging out with my male friends. I love to. But in terms of who I relate to more, it would have to be a woman. I have a very strong feminine side (you may have seen some photos) and I’m often mistaken for being gay. My wife, on first meeting me, was convinced I was gay. This may have been the make-up and the Spice Girls T-Shirt but many people have been fooled without the get-up.
So yes, I’m not a man’s man. I love watching football and I’m very proud of my reverse parking but if push came to shove, I’d rather paint my nails with the girls.